Why lack of Twi-news forces me to be creative…
So, let’s be honest. Twi-news is a bit of a fail lately. And not just an ordinary fail…an EPIC fail. Like Bella NOT singing “I wanna take a ride on your Disco stick” before the leg-hitch (Slade…I saw the script* you better not cut that scene ya hear?) So as many Twi-fans crash and burn while waiting for news (and I mean ANY news…like how many times do the 100 monkeys dry clean that banana costume? and will it be featured in Breaking Dawn as part of Emmett taking his sexual innuendos a liiitle too far and thereby getting his ass kicked by Charlie?) I decided to bring back the moderately funny…
*I didnt see the script. I just wanted to sound cool…I am evidently not.
So remember when I found this amazing comparison?
Doooood....its like SNL could read my miiiiind maaaan.....
Yeah, imagine my surprise when I saw THIS pic of Rob…
Imma tie you to the train tracks and make you watch the TUCK.....
And immediately thought of this….
Snidely Whiplash had perfected the art of the sex stache...
and then I saw Kellan…
"Okay, Gang, let's split up and search for clues...you and I will search in this bedroom right here"
Well, gang, it looks like we have another mystery on our hands...the case of the missing Anaconda!
Oh Ashley…
I wanna be loved by you, alone! Boop-boop-ba-doo..nt call the asylum!
Betty's next photo shoot involved her posing ONLY wearing paint....oh right...
Awww Jasper you droopy, adorable thing you…
Yeah...smile while you can Rathbone...Droopy's a Twi-prude and he's gonna kick your ass...
Jasper said RELAX...with some Valium...
Nikki was a hard one (twss) but I she totally fit into W.I.T.C.H. A cartoon I forced my little brother to watch with me after he made me watch all his violent anime stuff.
What? Cornelia can't Avada Kedavra anyone? LAME!
Cornelia Hale (yes Hale!) was shunned by her vampire family for preferring Rowling over Rice.
K-Stew was seriously the hardest (twss) but I found such a BAMF character after I saw this pic…
Boris dahlink...we must get rid of that moose and squirrel...and while we're at it...that wolf too.
After Edward left...Bella did some things...things she weren't proud of...
Imagine the entire Twilight saga playing out with these characters…Oh bless my little stripey socks, I do feel a FF coming on. “Eric captured Natasha’s lips with his…She struggled at first, trying to focus on the way Snidely’s ice-cold sparkly stache tickled her chin whenever he kissed her ”. Errrr…yeah…maybe not. I think I’ll stick to giant bananas and Emmett (twss).
And a special announcement…Sadcookie is sad no longer. I will be joined by my one and only twinsie, Fang and the my one and only squishy porcupine, StotheP. They will be adding their hilarious rants to this bloggy and I am uber excited! (No pressure guys…I just get excited) So, until they come out of the bloggy cave…Sadcookie out!
Oh, you. YOU. You crack my shit up. I wanna read this fic! I think . . . except without Dali up there. Gah! Why couldn’t he have just played Van Gogh? I’d rather see a severed ear than The Tuck! Or that stache!
Srsly, pandy. This is slathered in win as usual. I think I’m getting performance anxiety. Might have to borrow that banana costume. What? To hide in, of course! What were you thinking? Get your mind out of the gutter! Muah!
Yea!!!! An another site to cyber stalk StotheP and Fang. LTT and LTR are not enough – AS IF!
I saw Little Ashes this weekend and was overwhelmed by HHH nekkidness, the “Tuck” made me snicker as I had seen it many times before. I couldnt get over the first scene when Dali got out of the car with his ruffles and the HAIR!!! Oh My the hair!
gotta say, i just watched little ashes and kinda loved it, tuck and all. fun post, bb – can’t wait for the (not-so)moderately funny to be multiplied by 3!
I missed this one!!!!!
How?!?!? You must smack me upside the head next time.
I looooovvve Droopy.